“It was through our own couple’s counseling that I discovered how helpful the process can be to right the ship.”
Counseling requires vulnerability, so it seems fitting that I share some vulnerable parts of myself with you. At the twelve year mark of my marriage, my partner and I had grown apart and felt stuck during a stressful time of parenting and career. It was through our own couple’s counseling that I discovered how helpful the process can be to right the ship. We worked to understand the ways we were communicating and not feeling heard and how our emotional experiences were impacting one another in negative ways. After discovering the emotional layers under our words and actions, we were able to make adjustments that better supported one another in those chaotic moments, leaving us more connected. And now, when we don’t get it right, because no couple is perfect 100% of the time, we know how to repair and rebuild in the calm moments. We rediscovered why we fell in love to begin with and how to end the repetitive and destructive cycles we were stuck in.
“Couples counseling is what helped us find our way back to each other when we felt the most disconnected.”
While we were in couple’s counseling, I also began seeing a counselor individually. Through this journey I came to more fully know more and more parts of myself that had gotten lost and shoved to the side as a stay at home mom and devout supporter of my husband’s career. In my own counseling I found identity, empowerment and what actually makes me happy. Through all this I began seeing and experiencing the positive ripple effects of it into my own family and other relationships while feeling more fulfilled and with an internal sense of happiness. From all of this, I was drawn to sit across from others. Nothing makes me happier than seeing someone reconnect with themselves and start to shed the parts of themselves that are not longer working for them anymore. Or to see a couple truly care for one another’s needs and witness that spark of love reemerge.
“Through my individual journey I found identity, empowerment and what actually made me happy.”
I would be remiss if I didn’t add that prior to becoming a counselor, there have been many others versions of myself, to include an urban farmer, an ROTC cadet, and the over-achieving PTA mom to name a few. I have found as a mom, a wife, a daughter, a sister, a daughter in law, or an Army brat, that my lived experiences bring relatability and deep empathy into my counseling abilities. While my path and world view are certainly different from my clients, I can relate to being up all night with a sick kid, not being on the same page about something with your partner and so much more.
The relationships that I develop in my counseling work impact me in meaningful ways. There is a deep sense of fulfillment in helping others fall in love with themselves and their partners, whether it’s for the first time or all over again.
A Note on Inclusivity
In our work together, safety is foundational. At my core, being inclusive and valuing equality is paramount. My own work in these areas in crucial, and your lived experience will be valued and accepted as they are a part of you, shape your experience of the world and how you relate to others. My lived experience has been in and amongst many different ethnicities, cultures, genders and sexualities, and I truly hold they all add richness and depth to my life, our society and our culture as a whole. So, please, come as you are and know you will be safe and accepted.