Premarital Counseling
in Prairie Village, KS
Before the wedding, let's talk about what's actually underneath your disagreements.
Most premarital counseling focuses on surface-level compatibility — do you both want kids, how do you split chores, what's the budget. Those conversations matter, but they usually don't get at why two reasonable, loving people can still end up on opposite sides of the same argument for years. That's the part I focus on.
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What premarital counseling with me actually looks like
Every one of us grew up watching a version of marriage, money, parenting, and conflict play out in our family of origin — and most of it we absorbed without ever examining it. You may have never consciously decided that money should be saved cautiously, or spent freely, or that a "good parent" does things a certain way, or that a clean house means a calm home. But those beliefs are already in the room with you, shaping how you argue about finances, child-rearing, and household responsibilities long before you're aware they're there.
My work is to help you make those unconscious patterns conscious — for both of you — and then facilitate the kind of conversation that actually helps you understand where your partner's reactions are coming from, instead of just reacting to them. Along the way, I pay close attention to the attachment patterns at play: whether one or both of you tends to withdraw and avoid conflict, or lean anxious and pursue resolution urgently, since those patterns often explain more about a recurring fight than the topic itself does.My hope is that you leave with the confidence and self-understanding to show up authentically and without the fear of losing connection with others, all while getting your own needs met.
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Why do this before the wedding
It's much easier to understand these patterns with curiosity now, while you're building your life together, than to untangle them later after resentment has had years to set in. Premarital counseling isn't about fixing something broken — it's about walking in with your eyes open, having already had the harder conversations most couples don't get to until they're already stuck.
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Who is this for
Engaged couples, couples who are planning to marry, or any couple who wants to start their life together intentionally rather than assuming things will simply work themselves out. This is a natural extension of the couples work I already do — same approach, same attention to what's underneath the surface, just starting earlier.